Wow, it’s been a long time since I’ve written a blog post. I suppose I could be boring and tell you that yes, yet again it’s been down to a series of eye problems, haha. Sadly though, that’s not far from the truth; Corneilius (my second new cornea in case anyone thinks I bizarrely named my eye for no reason) hasn’t been making life easy for me. Strangely enough though, the problems haven’t been serious or causing any damage to my eyes, just bloody uncomfortable. Enough said about that, I’m sick of talking about my eye right now. Rest assured, we’re doing very well and on the road towards making a full recovery.
When I started my blog, I was nearing the end of one transplant recovery and knew a second was on the cards. However, it wasn’t until fairly recently I realised the influence my situation was having on my blog. If I’m honest, I started my blog at what was the loneliest, lowest point in my life. Even though I had friends around me (I’m forever grateful), many friends got bored and completely walked away. I desperately wanted to feel part of something and blogging filled that void.
So I blogged about everything. Everything. If you wanted to know my favourite lipstick or life changing body butter, it was coming at you served up with a side order of exclamation marks. There were book reviews, lifestyle posts and the odd fashion related post (I still cringe). And then, there were my beloved tea, craft and transplant posts. Every time I wrote about my transplant journey, I had tears rolling down my face because I was scared people were going to turn away from me.I owe you all an apology because not one single person did (or if they did, I didn’t notice). The friends I’ve made through blogging (and continue to make) have really been there for me.
That’s not to say I haven’t been honest in every blog post I’ve written because I have – brutally honest in some cases. There’s just few topics I feel are worthy of putting pen to paper for (or finger to key but that doesn’t really work). Gone is the over illustrated header, monthly favourites and embarrassing make up reviews I attempted to write. My blog will now focus on my true passions: food, health, lifestyle and tea. I’m starting a new series entitled Tea & Cake; visiting different tea rooms (to enjoy tea and cake, obviously) and writing about various topics I’d like to open up for discussion. I’ll continue to document my transplant journey, along with my food journey as a vegetarian (recipes, restaurant reviews etc) and the usual lifestyle posts I love writing. Not a complete overhaul, but more focus on subjects that genuinely matter to me and well, good food and tea are at the top of the list.
I guess my blog’s change in direction goes hand it hand with the type of posts/videos I now gravitate towards. A few years ago, I could spend hours reading/watching monthly favourites (to the extent I sat down with a pen and paper writing down my next purchases) and I’d jump on any post that reviewed a new lip product. Yeah, if it’s something I’m genuinely interested in I’ll hunt down relevant blog posts, but the excitement factor of consuming as many beauty product reviews as possible has completely gone. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still as nosey as I’ve always been (can’t resist a good lifestyle post) but I started feeling like ‘you’ve read one make up review, you’ve read them all.’ After everything I’ve gone through, my confidence is slowly restoring itself to being proud of the person I am, being proud of my achievements and as pathetic as it sounds, being proud of my interests and the fact I’m definitely an acquired taste at the best of times. Losing my vision as abruptly as I did knocked my life off balance and now my sight is being restored to it’s former glory, I don’t want to hide behind the guise I’ve created since my diagnosis. I guess it almost became like a protective shield I could hide behind, if that makes any sense at all.
Where does that leave crafts? I decided this topic deserved an entire blog dedicated to it. I’m not sure whether I’m crazy, but with the help of some very good friends, I decided to start Scottish Craft Focus. All my craft related posts – fair/product reviews, gift guides, interviews and tutorials – can now be found on a blog of their very own. Yes, it’s a huge amount of work but I can genuinely say I feel like I’ve found my place in the blogging community. And even if no-one ever reads my posts, leaves a comment or likes a single tweet, it’s perfectly okay because I’ve now fallen in love with blogging. And after a long, long journey, I’m learning to love myself too.